Thursday, April 29, 2010

Finding my voice & being a grouch puss

I am combining two posts into one today, not necessarily because they go together, but because one causes difficulty doing the other. I have an internal narrator in my head and on days when I am exceedingly grouchy, it is hard for it to tell me what is going on. At the best of times I will have pen and paper handy when it gets going telling me a story or good narration of what to write, but unfortunately it only seems to come out when my hands are busy and my mind isn't. And so I tend to miss (and by miss I mean forget)most of the brilliance coming from it. On the flip side, though, when my hands are idle, so is my little storyteller, so trying to force something out when I have the time to never actually works. [Case in point: Almost all of this post was written while I was at work feeding the cows. (Bossman gone, I stop to write quick between batches)]

On the grouchy side of things, as I have been for the past couple of days (For nor apparent reason I just seem to get all pissed off once in a while, and then I get more pissed BECAUSE I am mad, which just annoys me.), my little storyteller goes into hiding and refuses to come out for days.

Which leads me to my next point(which perhaps should have gone first, but whatareyagonnado?)

Finding my writing voice, or more accuratly, getting the voice in my head out onto the page intact and with the same genius (is that a tad big-headed, referring to the voice in my head as genius?ah well.) as the first time the words come together. Since I already love the voice in my head, and loathe the one that eventually always comes out, I am needing to practice that whole 'writing while inspired' thing.

And so I have stayed up way to late again trying to get these thoughts out, and they have lost their path(and sense) , i bid you goodnight.

[sidenote: I chose the ladder photo because it is sort of an opposite to what goes on with my head> as the ladder has to stay still for it to get the nice weeds growing around it, and if it moves the effect is ruined, whereas I have to keep going, otherwise the words cease to flow.]


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